Perception and Reality.

What you IMAGINE her doing at 2 a.m. :

• On the deck of a fancy yacht, cruising some magical, star-lined harbour...pastel-colored drink hoisted...smiling dreamy-eyed at her bastard model boyfriend, on her arm and holding her balance.

The probable REALITY:

• She's on her hands and knees, scraping puke from her 4-year old, out of the crevaces of the hardwood floor, with a butter knife.

What you IMAGINE she's doing, while you're stuck in traffic:

• Giving out her phone number to a co-worker, and all flirty with less than pure intentions.

The probable REALITY:

• She's annoyed, because she couldn't get size 7 bowling shoes at the alley, and has to suffer with a size smaller. And she won't shut up about it.

What you IMAGINE she's doing, when she says she'll be stuck late at work:

• Something illicit with the Peruvian cleaning guy.

The probable REALITY:

• Something even more unimaginably illicit with the American plant-watering guy.

Don't hang out with your own thoughts. They always tell the worst stories.