Validation is a strange conceptual experiment. Proper definition, according to my exhaustive research (meaning Google), is thus: "to recognize, establish, or illustrate the worthiness or legitimacy of" something.
The process of validating can be meticulously involved, or it can incredibly unscientific. Bascially, we just bend and shape (through denial) what we already know to be true, until it resembles some distorted justification of what we ultimately want and how we want it to be. Then we bounce these principles against someone we feel might be generally accepting of our influence. Maybe even a complete stranger. They confirm, based on our smiling and fuzzy compliments. And we smile, feeling good about what we have done.
And then continue to doubt.
Not that I'VE ever done anything requiring validation. I've just heard stories...
Let's say you've done something in a moment full of yourself. Maybe in an intoxicated giddyness. But soon after, you realize, maybe if this was the last act you'd ever perform, your life legacy shaping might not want to be defined by this graceless act.
The steps kind of go something like this:
1. The Drop - "Holy hell, I should have seen (heard) what I just did (said). "
2. The Blow Off - "No one pays attention to me anyway. It was all in the moment. Being spontaneous is encouragable, right? Impossible for anyone to even notice. I mean, quick, what did I wear yesterday? See...no one remembers."
3. The Bucket - "Well, maybe they will notice. But this was the only time. I've practiced being a good boy all year, so I've earned this one mis-step. There's bad buckets and good buckets of intention. This one is definitely in the good bucket, if everyone looks the other way."
4. The Ledge - "Maybe I shall be eaten by ravenous wolves tonight. That'll fix everything. Wait, it's a Wednesday. Does that mean I'll ruin everyone's weekend? Now they'll hate me eternally. Wonderful..."
5. The Glimmer Ray - "Seriously, it is what it is. No charges were filed, no one lost an appendage due to gross negligence."
6. The Resolution - Calm reassurance from someone else, wrapped up in truth paper we already knew we had, just around a different box. Like, "You acted on emotion and left it at that. Far worse things have happened, and you shouldn't apologize for it. Just owe yourself the dignity to not beat yourself up. "
Awe.
The lesson here is, never try.
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